1 Do you go to his favourite spots, hoping to bump into him?
If you’re going out of your way to go to places where you know he’ll be, you haven’t quite moved on. Consider your ex the most boring person in the world and leave him alone. It’s better for both of you.
2 Are you dipping in one toe where you should be diving in?
If you’ve started dating again and find yourself holding back emotionally, it could be that you haven’t completely healed. If you can’t work through your unresolved feelings about your past relationship while being in a new one, you should think about taking some serious me-time to address it.
3 Is no-one managing to measure up?
If you feel like no-one is measuring up against him, you’re probably still clutching those rose-tinted glasses pretty tightly. Make a real effort to think about the things that were hard, too. No relationship is perfect. You’re losing out on the chance to meet some pretty wonderful, imperfect people while you’re holding on.
4 Do you even like your friend Paul?
Do you find you’re holding on to relationships where the only thing you have in common is your ex? Maybe it’s his friend that you got on really well with or his cousin. Whoever it is, make sure you’re their friend for the right reasons.
5 Does your ex absolutely need to come collect his dirty old slippers?
Are you making up ‘urgent’ reasons to see him? Stop focusing on the hard things that are happening and using them as an excuse to reach out. If you choose to see the good, you’ll see life can be pretty damn fabulous. Even when your ex isn’t on your arm. You’ve got this – move on.
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