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7 Times After-Sex Silence Would Have Been Golden

Sometimes you just gotta shhhh…

Sure, pillow talk can be a lot of fun and some serious bonding takes place during those post-sex chats. But a Reddit thread on awkward things that people have heard or said directly after sex is proof that sometimes silence is absolutely golden.

1 ‘I had a one-night stand with a guy who turned out to be an arrogant idiot. Right after he finished, he said, “I think that was some of my best work yet. You’re welcome.”‘ – ladyluves

2 ‘Before we were married, my wife and I finished at the same time during sex. I yelled, “Jinx!” She was like, “What are you…”, and I was like, “You can’t talk!”‘ – boyvsfood

3 ‘One time this guy started laughing really hard. Like a hysterical, slightly maniacal fit. I’m still not sure if it was a good thing, a bad thing or I was about to be murdered, but I high-tailed it out of there pretty quickly.’ – growllison

4 ‘I once started chanting, “Bacon and eggs!” just as I was about to “finish” a rather energetic session. Simply because I know she blushes easily. Now, she blushes almost every time someone orders breakfast! Bonus: she already loved bacon and eggs so just not ordering them isn’t an option.’ – shouldvemadedickjoke

5 ‘I said, “That’ll do pig, that’ll do.” It was a compliment!’ – pm_me

6 ‘He flexed his muscles in the mirror for like 20 minutes and then said, “The lighting in here is different than at the gym.”‘ – thehoneybee815

7 ‘My husband and I finished, and he decided it would be hilarious to cheer about our sex. He was all, “GIVE ME AN ‘I’, GIVE ME AN ‘N'” and wouldn’t stop until I had responded to each letter and we’d cheered out “INTERCOURSE”.’ – insweettime

Read 10 Sex Anniversaries Every Couple Should Celebrate

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