You might not be able to remember it the next morning, but these are definitely the thoughts that go through your mind when you’ve had one too many.
1. Why is everybody so obsessed with me?
2. I am TOTALLY rocking this whole smudged-eyeliner-knotted-hair look. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever looked hotter.
3. I should Snapchat my sexy face to, like, everyone.
4. I am definitely way too sober. More shots!
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5. The bartender is so attracted to me right now… look at him staring.
6. I should dance on this table, that’s what it’s here for.
7. Nobody can see Sarah’s vomit in my hair, I’m sure of it.
8. Okay, I’m pretty dizzy, but it’s definitely the good kind of dizzy.
9. I wonder how my ex is doing?
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10. My ex was The One. He was THE ONE and I ruined everything.
11. I should totally text him.
12. Ten incoherent texts isn’t enough, let me send a few sad faces.
13. Ooh, that guy across the bar is hot, and he’s checking me out.
14. I should definitely go home with him.
15. THIS IS MY SONG. MY SONG IS ON!
16. Everyone in here is so funny! I love everyone. Everyone is the best.
17. I am the best dancer here. I’m the best dancer of all time. I should be a professional dancer.
18. I think I’m gonna be sick…
19. Nope! All good!
20. More tequila! Tequila for everybody! I’m so rich!
21. I don’t think anybody saw me fall.
22. I should introduce myself to everyone in here.
23. My karaoke voice is on point right now.
24. Pretty sure this guy I’m making out with is the love of my life.
25. I am the best.