Too much drinking, sneaking your guy home without disturbing anyone and waking up with a hangover.
We have 10 of the best sex ideas which will help you stay silent!
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1. The Dancer’s Stretch.
With feet flat on the floor, bend forwards so that your hands touch the floor too. Then get him to grab you from behind. You’ll be so busy trying not to fall over, you won’t have time to make a noise.
2. The Cross
Lie on your side. Get him to reach around to your clitoris and enter you from behind. Cross your legs when he’s inside you so it feels really tight for him. Rock against him gently. If anyone disturbs you, you’re just having a nice cuddle aren’t you?
3. The Sit-Down Oral (For Him)
If you’re the noisy one, go down on your guy to muffle your moans. Get hime to sit in a chair with his bum over the edge and you kneeling in front of him. Everyones a winner.
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4. The Inside Thrust
Lie on top of your guy. When he enters you, try to move your body as little as possible and instead squeeze your pelvic-floor muscles as hard as you can, over and over again, until its all too much for him.
5. The Sit-Down Oral (For You)
If your man’s a screamer, kneel down facing away from him and spread your knees. Get him to go down on you from behind. It’ll feel different because it feels as though he’s doing it upside down.
Sneaky Tips for Keeping Quiet:
6. Make it a competition
If you challenge each other to see who can be the quietest, it’ll turn into a horny game.
7. Keep the Filth
By writing dirty notes, saying all things you’d usually whisper (or shout) to each other in bed.
8. The Day Before You Go to Your Parents’ House
Send him an e-mail describing your erotic requests, and then meet up for the wildest, noisiest sex session ever. By the next night you won’t be fit for anything more than quiet spoons anyway!
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9. Horny Over the Festive Meal
Oh no, you spilt gravy all over your lovely new top! Your guy will just have to accompany you to the bathroom to help you wash it off. Lock the door, run the taps and make the most of your undisturbed five minutes.
10. Make Up a White Lie to Tell His Mother
Tell his mom that you scream in your sleep because you often have terrible nightmares. Let her know that the best thing she can do to help is just to ignore any strange noises she hears – and that theres definitely no need for her to check on you!