Who hasn’t Googled themselves before? I certainly have! And a few other people as well.
While the web search engine certainly comes in handy for the COSMO Online Team on a daily basis, digging through your new boyfriend’s past is like playing Russian Roulette – each spin brings you closer to either the end or another chance at a spin. Whichever way you look at it, Googling him is risky business. You might not like what you discover, but on the other hand, you may be pleasantly surprised.
We put the question to two relationship coaches from Po10tia, a Pretoria-based coaching institute: Should you Google your new boyfriend?
YES: Fanie Pretorius
• It’s another way of you getting to know him better, and he should be happy that you want to.
• You’ll discover things that may become a part of your life. The sooner you know what they are, the better.
• The information you find could put any early suspicions you have of him to bed.
• Whatever negative information you discover could lead to an open and honest discussion. Communication is a building block of trust.
• The positive things you find will simply confirm you’ve made the right decision to date him.
• Sometimes you just need to know if you’re dating a serial killer or not.
Having a gadget like Google these days is a blessing, says Pretorius. ‘It would be stupid not to use it – with or without him knowing.’
NO: Barry van Rensburg
• You are stealing the poor guy’s only chance to make a first impression. Last time I checked, stealing was a crime.
• You are watching him without him knowing. Only perverts do that.
• You are trying to gain private information that will nail the guy forever. Is that fair?
• Stealing, stalking and spying are all acts of distrust – so much for building a relationship.
• He’s not there to defend himself. At this rate, the poor guy will never get parole.
• Will you believe Google if the search comes out clean? Be honest, you are looking for dirt. Stay out of the laundry!
‘Rather swap a Google approach for a Skype approach,’ suggests van Rensburg. ‘Talk, don’t stalk.’
Now that you have the arguments for and against Googling him, we’ll leave the final decision up to you…