This is a story about true love. True love that starts with a romantic proposal at a big shopping centre and ends in jail.
Our story starts with a young man named William Cornelius, 25, who sought to win his true love’s heart with a bold proclamation of his love over the loudspeaker at a Walmart in Bay City Michigan. He purchased a ring at the jewellery counter (he definitely did pay for that) and presented it to Sheri Moore, 20, on his hands and knees. Store cameras show the couple embracing as shoppers exploded in applause. That’s where our story should end.
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But alas, this is a tragedy, and as tragedies so often do, this one takes a dark turn. It seems after their beautiful moment of love, the couple found themselves on the wrong side of the law. The Smoking Gun reports Cornelius and Moore went to a nearby Spencer’s gift store (seeking the perfect engagement present, perhaps?).
At the store, Cornelius allegedly stole several sex toys, including a vibrator, an edible thong, and something called “BJ Blast” oral sex candy, which I will be performing extensive research on later. The items he allegedly stole were worth about R1300, total. My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee the more I have, for both are infinite. *Wipes tear from eye.*
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Police caught up to the newly engaged couple at the food court, where Cornelius had fallen asleep at a table while trying to tie his shoe. They arrested him and Moore, who was charged with stealing some jewellery from Walmart.
The couple is currently out on bail.
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This post originally appeared on cosmopolitan.com
