The New Rules of Chivalry

They don’t make men like they used to. Which isn’t entirely a bad thing.

In the Middle Ages chivalry involved riding around on horses wielding swords and looking heroic. It also meant that men stayed virgins for the women they loved, and that love affairs were to remain secret. After cars replaced horses the meaning of chivalry changed to mean opening doors for women and ordering food for them at restaurants. However, this sad set of rules is rather patronizing and due for an update. So COSMO came up with a few suggestions for the new rules of chivalry.

Status Gamble
The modern chivalrous man should be first to update the relationship-status line on Facebook from ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’. And he should do it sooner rather than later in order to avoid guessing games and awkward introductions when running into friends. One very important restriction: he needs to be sure that you feel the same way before making it Facebook official.

Protection Tactic
Instead of endangering his life by running after the baddies that stole your Vuitton, the modern day gentleman should think on his feet.
First prize: he spots the bag snatcher before he gets close enough to grab your bag and nudges you across the pavement.
Second prize: after your bag is stolen he offers to stand in queues to help you recover your missing items.

Precious Cargo
Unlike the Middle Age man, Modern men no longer have packhorses to carry their possessions around. Translation: your handbag has now become his packhorse. The new-age gentleman has large-enough pockets in which to carry his possessions. Or he carries a stylish (yet macho) man bag. Or he goes for the smallest cellphone and ditches the Stormers key ring to save space.

Glove Love
A girl should always carry condoms but that doesn’t let any guy off the hook. Under the new laws of chivalry, men will be required to keep the rubber interesting. Please note, guys: that means a lot more than Ribbed For Her Unoriginal Pleasure and Sheer Laziness.

If your night in shining Prada manages any of the above, he deserves a little role-playing from you as a horny damsel in distress.