1 Calm down, he’s probably just busy with his Internet startup company. He did say their app is supposed to launch Monday (I think?) and it’s only been three days since I heard from him. That’s a long time in texting but in the real world, that’s probably just him being like, ‘Whoa! How is it Wednesday? I was so caught up with my new app creation that I forgot about texting this girl I like.’ Yeah, definitely.
2 He’s probably texted me over and over again but then he deleted it before hitting send because it’s not perfect enough. Aww, that’s so hypothetically sweet. I wish I could text him to tell him I don’t care if his text response is perfect or not because I like him just the way he is.
3 Crap. What if his phone fell into a puddle and he lost all his contacts? Or it fell and broke, and he didn’t keep backups of all his numbers because seriously, why would you? If I lost or dropped my phone, I wouldn’t have his number, so it makes sense.
4 Perhaps I should just text him again in case he didn’t even realise he never replied. Sometimes I forget about an old text and then get a bunch of new ones, and it pushes the older ones down, and then I forget that I didn’t respond. So if I text him now, I’ll be back on top. Genius.
5 You know what? Fuck him. If I’m not even worth 15 seconds of his time after I was clearly cuter and cooler and so much smarter than him (seriously that app idea is going to fail in two years, come on), then he’s not worth a second more of my time.
6 I should text him and be like, ‘Haha. You want to ghost me? Well, too bad because I’m ghosting YOU!’ but then I realise that doesn’t make sense.
7 Sad face because he seemed so nice. Yeah, the app idea was stupid but I’m sure he’d make it work and anyway, I really saw this going somewhere. Plus, he smelled really good and seemed to really like me. Seriously, what the eff dude?
8 Whatever. Men suck. Let’s get wine. Wine is my boyfriend now.
This article was originally published on Cosmopolitan.com