It’s not hard to tell when a guy is blatantly standing between you and your goals. But when he’s holding you back in subtler ways, the signs may be harder to detect, explains Elizabeth C Hechtman, psychotherapist and personal coach. Answer the following questions to see if your man is your biggest fan… or just dragging you down.
‘My ex was always cutting me off at dinner parties. I’d be telling a story and he’d make some stupid pornographic joke to bring the attention back to himself,’ laments Gwen*, 29.
‘If you’re always the supporting actress in his life without any opportunity to take centre stage, ask yourself whether you’re okay with that,’ advises clinical psychologist, Dr Jared D Von Arx. If not, it’s time to have a talk with him – he may not even be conscious of his behaviour. Then, conduct random spot checks to see if he actually listened. While out with friends, tell a joke or a story and see if he jumps in with the punch-line. Or hold back the banter and notice if he tries to draw you into the conversation or happily blabs on without interruption.
*Names have been changed