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Do Millennials Even Believe in 'The One' Any More?

If you believe he exists, how do you spot him?

It’s 2017, folks. In a time where love (or something resembling it) is a right swipe away, is there room for that fairy-tale kind of love we were made to believe in as children? I asked 10 South African Millennials if they believe in ‘The One’, and what it evens means to them.

1 ‘I believe in “Multiple Ones”. I don’t think there is only one person for each of us. Rather, I think we all get a few great loves that’ll swoop in, f*ck our shit up in a huge and meaningful way, and kind of change us a little bit. Maybe they make you grow up in some ways or calm down in others. I believe in great loves.’ – Kim, 29

2 ‘No. I don’t. And I try to avoid dating people who do. It’s five months in. Why are we talking about marriage? People fall out of love all the time.’ – Kyla, 25

3 ‘The concept of “The One” always just pissed me off a little. I’m a realist and always thought it was a self-indulgent way of romanticising our desire to mate. Now I’m with someone. And I’d marry her tomorrow if I had the chance. And I’m okay with being self-indulgent because she might not be “The One”, but she’s the best one.’ – Katlego, 25

4 ‘I don’t believe in “The One” at all. I do believe, however, that if you find someone who you’re compatible with, in that kind of crazy and calm love, it’s worth holding onto it and trying your best not to f*ck it up. There are lots of people you could date and end up being very happy with. There are few that just fit.’ – David, 27

5 ‘LOL, no. No “One” for me, please. I’m 24 and the world to me should be more like a tapas lunch than a sit-down dinner. I’d like to try a bit of everything.’ – M, 26

6 ‘I believe there is one someone for each of us. And I’m waiting patiently and refuse to settle for anything less than what I’ve imagined since I was young. My friends joke that I’m a Charlotte, Sex And The City style, and I’m okay with that.’ – Meg, 25

7 ‘I kind of believed in “The One”, because I thought I’d found mine. She found Tinder during our relationship. So, to be honest, I’m not sure if there’s room for this mushy and romantic way of thinking in the world we live in any more.’ – Al, 29

8 ‘I think it’s a load of crap and ends up making people try to force things into place. People who believe in “The One” want everything to be so perfect that they’ll try to force it into place instead of being in a flawed and human relationship with a flawed human.’ – anonymous

9 ‘To me, “The One” is someone who can, in one moment, make you feel excited about the simple act of breathing . I don’t think there’s only “One” one for each of us, but that’s what I imagine finding one of the “Ones” feels like.’ – Simone, 24

10 ‘I’d never admit it to him or to my friends, but I feel certain that my boyfriend is it. I’ve loved other men and been loved by other men, but nothing has ever felt this certain and calm, and I’ve never loved anyone this much before. It’s the best. Also, the sex is the best.’ – T, 24

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