Full disclosure: the only time I’ve ever interacted with a sex toy was this one time, during undergrad, when my squad and I thought it would be hysterical, at 1am and after roughly one hundred Jägerbombs, to visit the Adult World next to Decodance and buy the largest, most obscene vibrator on offer. I learnt two things that day. Firstly, one hundred Jägerbombs do not feel quite as lit eight hours later. Secondly, having to explain to your mom why there is a foot-long, spiked, purple glitter vibrator next to a half-eaten packet of Niknaks on the kitchen counter is not fun when said Jägerbombs are threatening to climb back up your throat at any given moment. Needless to say, I haven’t dallied with toys of the naughty persuasion since – not until a pretty pink box from Désir Intimate Collection containing IMTOY’s Rhino arrived on my desk.
Let’s be honest: the adult industry is not renowned for its classiness. Your garden-variety sex-toy packaging usually includes ’80s babes with DDs, scarily gigantic dildos, Comic Sans and every crude pun you can think of. There’s a reason people emerge from sex shops in sunglasses and trench coats, clutching brown papers bags. The good news? Not only is The Rhino (R1 799) available online at Désir (no late-night, fake-moustache-wearing, adult shop-visiting missions for you, gurl), but its packaging makes it look like a delivery from a boutique stationery store.
The Millennial Pink box is beautifully designed and slides open to reveal a layer of craft paper and decorative cardboard padding. You really get the sense that you’re giving yourself, and your vag, a VIP experience. Which you are. The experience doesn’t end when you clap eyes on the product, BTW, which is so beautiful that you almost want to frame it in your living your room. (If that wasn’t a weird AF thing to do.)
IMTOY’s Rhino has a host of awesome features. These are my favourites:
- It’s 2017’s answer to the much-loved ‘rabbit-style’ vibrator. Its curved wand-style tip focuses on delivering deep internal pleasure while its flexible horn gets to work on your clit, where it provides intense direct stimulation.
- It’s really, really pretty. The Rhino is a super-cute sex toy with a super-sophisticated edge. Its gentle, smooth curves are complemented by an all-over pastel-pink exterior and trendy rose-gold base – afar cry from the neon-and-glitter monstrosities hen parties are made of.
- It feels like a million bucks. Aside from being completely dust- and waterproof, this luxury silicone gadget is phthalate-free, non-porous, and 100% body-safe. It’s also drag-free and silky-soft to the touch, meaning that it feels damn incredible.
- It’s discreet. The Rhino boasts two quiet tungsten-alloy motors, which is awesome if you don’t want to share your sexcapades with your housemates.
- It’s hi-tech AF. IMTOY’s Rhino has 16 vibration patterns, ranging from pretty chill to OMFG-this-is-AH-MAAAZING. It also boasts magnetic USB charging for instant, anytime, eco-friendly power. Oh, and it comes with a downloadable ZOO app, which connects your toy to your smart device via Bluetooth.
After downloading the ZOO app, my partner and I spent a good 30 minutes just exploring the many features it has to offer. IMTOY has really thought of everything. Apart from the 16 (rad) vibration patterns, the app boasts a range of nifty features from a Bluetooth-enabled ‘shake’ function that transforms your smartphone into a literal pleasure wand, to being able to draw your own vibration pattern. I mean!?
Our favourite feature, however, is the ability to sync the app (and the Rhino) to your iTunes library, giving a whole new meaning to the term ‘beating off’. Ha ha. But seriously, if you’ve never experienced a vibrator pulsing in time to the dulcet tones of Bad And Boujee, then you simply haven’t lived, my friend.
I’m no sex-toy expert, but IMTOY’s Rhino ticked all my personal sexy toy boxes (namely the need for fun, and to feel damn good).
The ZOO app (particularly the iTunes interaction capability) is an incredible way to spice up your sex life. In fact, I’m currently working on a ‘Songs To Bone To’ Google doc with bae. Seriously, I don’t think I’ve been more excited by anything, ever, than I am by the prospect of orgasming to the beat of R Kelly’s Ignition (Remix).
But aside from the novelty factor, the toy packs a powerful punch in the feels department – and its rumbling vibrations provide deep stimulation of both the G-spot and the clit. It feels really good. And your partner will feel really good being able to control your pleasure while watching you get off. We loved the Rhino and, for sex-toy newbies, both it and the app were simple and intuitive to use.
The Last Word
The Rhino, and the entire ZOO Collection, is available online at Désir Intimate Collection. Use the promo code IMTOY2017 to get R150 off any IMTOY product at Désir until the end of July 2017.
Oh, and US$1 from the sale of every ZOO Collection toy is donated to the Endangered Wildlife Trust. As if you needed another great reason to get off ?
This post was sponsored by Désir and IMTOY.