We get it: date #1 was nothing special and you’re 99% convinced you’ll be fine if you never see this dude again. Nothing was ‘wrong’ with him, per se, but there were absolutely no fireworks to speak of. In fact, there wasn’t even one of those sparklers they put on Spur’s birthday ice creams. He’s asked you on a second date, and your first instinct is to decline politely and get back to swiping. Here’s why you should change your mind.
1 You haven’t actually learnt anything about him. All you know is that he grew up in your neighbouring suburb and he’s not mentally deranged, because he seemed perfectly normal and pleasant on your date. No matter how spot-on you think you are when it comes to first impressions, you know nothing about this guy. Maybe the bits about him that could make your heart flutter just haven’t been revealed yet.
2 You may not have been in the right state of mind. Face it, you have to be in the right mood when you’re meeting up with a stranger for drinks for the first time – that shit is stressful! It could very well be the case that your head wasn’t totally in the game during your date. Perhaps you had a particularly awful day at work, or a blow-out with your bestie. Either way, a bad mood can make any experience unpleasant. Why not give him a second chance, just in case?
3 Just because you weren’t totally attracted to him doesn’t mean you’ll never be. How many of your past relationships have been with guys who started out as friends? Exactly. Attraction grows over time – this is fact. Liking someone as a person can make them seem incredibly sexy. Perhaps if you go on a second date, you’ll start to see it for yourself.
4 You haven’t had a real conversation yet. ‘But we dragged that drink out for almost two hours!’ you say. That doesn’t matter. You weren’t having a real conversation; you were just sussing each other out. You were having a fully surface-level, generic encounter, with the sorts of questions you’d ask a new colleague. You haven’t yet had the experience of a real, deep conversation – and maybe that’s something this guy will be damn good at.
5 You have nothing to lose. If you’re uncertain about your feelings for this person after your first date, the best-case scenario is that you hit it off on your second date and he turns out to be someone you could really see yourself with. So what if you still feel zilch for this guy after Date #2? The only negative thing that comes of it is you spent an hour or two of your time giving someone a second chance. And that sort of effort can turn out to be so worth it if you’re serious about finding a relationship.
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