The chance of being in a relationship with someone completely suited to you is pretty slim. Maybe they’re perpetually late and you’re a stickler for punctuality; maybe they put tomato sauce in their pesto pasta and it makes you feel literally ill. It’s normal to make concessions for certain harmless behaviours – but there are some red flags in any relationship that you SHOULD take note of. Start with these:
1 If they can’t acknowledge when they’re wrong or apologise
Relationships are damn hard. If you’re with someone who makes it near impossible to resolve the inevitable conflicts you’ll have, you’re in trouble.
2 Lying about trivial things
Whether it’s that they were at the gym when they were actually eating their weight in cheesecake or that they ‘have plans with the boys’ when they’re invited to your folks for dinner, if someone lies about the little things, they’ll lie about the big things.
3 If you’re a side-chick-turned-bae
I’m not saying it will definitely happen, but if they were happy to cheat on their ex with you, they’re probably comfortable with infidelity.
4 If they can’t accept a sincere apology
2017 is likely to punish your ass enough. You don’t need an SO who will keep punishing you, even after you’ve admitted to an error and apologised for it.
5 Eggshells are for the compost heap, not the soles of your feet
If you feel like you’re always a second away from ‘being in trouble’ or that you’re doing even the tiniest thing incorrectly, your partner might be a bit too controlling. You’re flawed, you’re human. Be with someone who, worst case, ‘puts up’ with your flaws or, best case, finds them endearing.
6 You’re a human, not a hobby
If Saturday rolls around and your SO sulks because you’re off to a boxing class and they have nothing to do, it’s not the best sign. They should have a pretty bustling and busy life outside of you. You can’t be their entertainment.
7 You saw a dolphin and they rode a shark
If you’re with someone who is in some kind of ‘competition’ with you and is constantly trying to one up you on everything, you probably don’t have enough room for yourself within the relationship. FYI, your day was just as important as theirs.
8 Subtle bashing of your character
If your SO has a seemingly subtle and ‘harmless’ way of pointing out what’s wrong with you, they’re likely trying to lower your self-esteem. This is crazy because they should only ever make you feel good about yourself. It could be that they’re scared of you leaving them so they want to make you feel too insecure to do so, or maybe it’s because they want to be the ‘star’ of the relationship. Whatever it is, it ain’t good.
9 If you’re fighting from the very start
I remember once hearing, ‘If it’s not easy in the beginning, it probably won’t ever be.’ If you’re two weeks into a new relationship and you’re already screaming at one another, you quite simply might not be compatible.
10 If they roll their eyes
And not in a playful way when you suggest having Thai food for the fourth night in a row. If you’re trying to speak about your feelings with them and they roll their eyes, it’s an indication that they’re not even bothering to take you seriously.
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