Hot Things to Try After Sex
If foreplay is considered the appetizer to sex, then a great sheet session is comparable to a delicious entrée at a five-star restaurant. But what about dessert? 'There are few places and times where you and your partner are more physically and emotionally connected to each other than after sex,' says certified sex educator Lou Paget, author of The Great Lover Playbook. Just like everything else bedroom related, afterplay is very much about touch. But it's also about timing. That's why we've organized these moves according to the specific times when they're most erotically effective.
SECONDS AFTER SEX
• Immediately after climax, with your guy still inside you, run your fingers down his back, over his buttocks, and along his sides. Keep doing this technique in a slow rhythm up and down his back using a wavelike motion. Since most men's backs are very sensitive, it will soothe him and keep him stimulated at the same time.
• During sex, blood flow in the body rushes to the genitals. As it leaves, even the gentlest touch might be too much pressure for him, but lightly blowing on his package will help cool him off while his body settles down.
• Right after a red-hot mattress session, our egos are super vulnerable. So if there's something he did that drove you insane in a good way – from his technique to his kissing – now's the best time to tell him.
• Individually, most of us have a couple of post-sex sweet spots: areas that are particularly receptive to being touched, licked, tickled, or kissed. They can be anywhere from your collarbone to the insides of your wrists, where the skin is thin. Experiment with him to find each of yours.
• Leave him in the bed, then take a warm washcloth and gently towel him off in his below-the-belt region. His body temperature will be up post-climax, but don't use a cold cloth or it will be too jarring – the sensation of the warm heat will feel more pleasurable.
MINUTES AFTER SEX
• While lying on your sides spooning, take his hand and cup it around your breast, and hug his knees inside the backs of yours. Men aren't wired to be verbal post-orgasm, but this move will make you feel connected to him without even having to speak.
• He may not be in the mood to talk, but he can definitely listen, as long as it's something mellow and soothing. Have the remote to your stereo or iPod near the bed so you can hit 'play' without getting up. Suggestions: Lenny Kravitz, Coldplay, Natasha Bedingfield, or a customized mix CD or playlist.
• Have a heavy make-out session, alternating long, open-mouthed kisses with gentle nibbling. Kissing makes your pleasure endorphins skyrocket.
• After ejaculation, some men's sense of smell may be heightened. Light a scented candle that gives off a yummy aroma like vanilla or cinnamon.
• Many guys love lounging in bed after sex but crave physical space on the mattress. But instead of rolling over, create non-touching intimacy by lying on your sides facing each other. Or lie on your backs and just hold hands.
• Lead him into the shower 15 minutes later. Gently washing and caressing each other – especially with a frothy soap or body wash – is sexy in a nurturing way.
AN HOUR AFTER SEX
• Brush different parts of your body – your fingertips, a strand of hair, your breasts – past his lips. There are big concentrations of nerve endings on the lips, which are extremely sensitive to touch and will raise his arousal levels.
• Feed each other sensual foods to get your blood sugars back up, among other things. Bite-size snacks that have some fat and sugar, such as chocolate or ice cream, are ideal.
• Create anticipation for the next time by suggesting a spicy new twist. The perfect example: 'The next time we have sex, I'd like to try doing it in front of a full-length mirror.' Boom: You have planted a tantalizing visual that he will feel eager to bring to life as soon as physically possible.
• Keep a set of dice by your bedside table, and take turns rolling to decide which one of you gets to do what to each other. For example, if you roll a 5, he gets five teasing kisses down his happy trail. If he rolls a 2, he owes you a two-minute foot rub (or have him massage your scalp – it can be surprisingly erotic). Before long, the dice will be on the floor, and the two of you will be going at it again.
• Get just a little bit dressed. Put on something that covers up your goods but that you know he finds hot. Depending on his personal preference, that could mean anything from a bra and panties to his white undershirt. It'll pave the way for a sultry striptease.
• Turn him on his stomach and give him a gluteus maximus massage. Start by gently rubbing his buns, then with some flesh in your grasp, 'stir' them in circles, until you're gently spreading his cheeks. By doing so, you're also indirectly stimulating his package from an exciting new angle – an unexpectedly intense way to get his blood flowing down there for round 2.