S&TSG - Dating Tips From Around The World
I love living in a city – the people, the clubs, the music, the fashion... But being a single girl in one can be tough. Yes, a gorgeous man can walk past you in the road and make flirty eyes with you, but he'll just as quickly disappear and your chances of bumping into him again are as slim as Posh's legs.
Mind you, small-town singledom is just as tricky. Dating in my tiny home town was like an episode of Days Of Our Lives – any potential new man had usually slept with Lisa* from the beauty shop, cheated on her with Katie* who runs the local bar and kissed my best friend before meeting me. Unless you live in Cumbria – where there are 10 men to every lucky lady – it's pretty much slim pickings.
I don't want to blame geography for my ongoing singledom, but I did wonder if all women around the world have the same dating dilemmas as me. Surely if I lived in Italy I'd have been seduced by an Armani-clad hottie called Fabio by now? Or maybe it's just as complicated wherever you are. To find out, I sent a shout-out to all the global editions of COSMO, asking single girls everywhere for their dating advice.
So, where does Mr Right hang out? In Croatia, COSMO singletons tell me, 'We're more likely to find Mr Right in unexpected places, like the grocery store or on a bench, enjoying the view.' Sadly, my local park bench doesn't look out over the Adriatic coast. It overlooks a car park and is usually occupied by a bunch of hoodies.
In Brazil, 'the best place to meet men is in dancing bars, where you come across as fun and carefree, not desperate.' Clubs are a good place to pull in Korea too, where women entice men with dirty-dancing moves known as the 'Bubi Bubi'. But, sadly I'm no Beyoncé – I was booted out of ballet school and my Jason Donovan dance routine only came fifth (out of five) in a school talent contest.
Maybe I should take advice from the Aussie COSMO girls: 'We've learnt not to take dating too seriously. Enjoy meeting new men and remember there's nothing wrong with being picky.' Ah, music to my fussy ears – as was German COSMO's attitude: 'If you're after a relationship, sex on the first date is a big no-no. But a lot of women just want casual fun, so they should go for it!'
Not everywhere is so carefree. If I'd grown up in India, my parents would've chosen my husband for me. Cue visions of being shoved down the aisle at 18 with my cardigan-wearing neighbour. What's more, in some parts of Africa I'd be forbidden to make the first move on a man. And in Russia, I wouldn't even be allowed to hold a guy's hand because it's 'unfeminine'.
Suddenly I feel lucky to live in a country where decisions about men, dating and sex are all mine. The city may be too big and my home town too small, but at least if I want to date five men a month, or one man every five months, I can.
Most single girls have moments where they feel they're the only ones left. Mine was last week. Gathering for a group photo at a friend's party, all the couples were wrapped around each other while I had nothing but an empty wine glass to cuddle up to. But the truth is, I'm not alone. Because if you're enduring an 'I want him but can't have him' phase, or revelling in an 'I know I shouldn't but he has a huge penis!' moment, chances are that millions of other single girls are
too. Whether you live in Norwich or Norway, Inverness or Indonesia, Leeds or Latvia, being a single girl in today's world is empowering, exciting, sometimes heartbreaking but never, ever dull. And if things slow down on the man front, treat yourself to a long weekend in Cumbria...
*Names have been changed