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Is Twitter Killing Conversation?

Victoria’s Secret model Miranda Kerr tweets, ‘Walking up to get a bagel’ to her many followers. It’s fascinating because it’s Miranda (She eats – hurrah! And bagels – OMG!), but it’s also an excellent example of the details people feel compelled to publicise in Twitterville.

Once upon a time, in a land far less technologically advanced, people would call or catch up with each other face-to-face. Then along came Twitter. Suddenly, Facebook is so last year and we’re glued to Miranda’s morning bagel run… but is it a good thing?

TWEET TWEET
Karen Brooks, associate professor of media studies at Southern Cross University, believes Twitter has a lot of positive implications for relationships. ‘In a time-poor society like ours, Twitter lets you quickly, briefly stay in touch with what’s going on in your friends’ lives. It closes geographical distance, and you can show you care by responding to tweets that interest you.’

For Alicia, a 28-year-old fashion stylist, Twitter has opened up new friendship avenues. ‘My best friend in Brisbane doesn’t Twitter, but her husband does – so now I end up talking to him more than l talk to her! We’re both keen cooks, so we chat about what we’re making for dinner.’ So is her best friend jealous of this burgeoning, food-based relationship? ‘No, not at all. Twitter’s made it more palatable to have conversations with your friend’s partners because it’s non-threatening, it’s open, it’s there for the whole world to see. While l wouldn’t SMS or e-mail a friend’s partner unless l had a specific reason, Twitter is different. It’s a way of connecting that wouldn’t have happened before.’

Beth, a 25-year-old retail worker, isn’t as much of a fan. ‘My boyfriend is constantly twittering on his iPhone. We’ll go out to dinner with friends, and he’ll sit down the end of the table and tweet whatever comes into his head. It’s really annoying.’ Brooks acknowledges this is a downside. ‘If Twitter is the only way you stay in touch, friendships can become superficial, because they’re formulated on sound bites rather than emotional depths.’

RIP THE ART OF CONVERSATION
If we’re constantly connected and informed of the occurrences and musings of a person’s day via Twitter, what could we possibly have to talk about over dinner that isn’t already public knowledge? ‘I think we only reveal a couple of layers of ourselves on Twitter,’ says Brooks. ‘Plumbing the real emotional depths is something you do with your close friends over coffee, when you have that face-to-face, physical contact.’

TWITTER SNAPS
There’s a lot of talk about Twitter enriching conversation. ‘Tweets are conversation starters in many ways,’ says Brooks. ‘What can you say in 140 characters, really? “I had a lousy day at work” or “Damien dumped me”. You’re not going to know the ins and outs.’

Sure, there are oversharers on Twitter whose posts would make awkward conversation, but Brooks thinks tweeting intimate details is tactical. ‘You can’t offer all of yourself online – people are more than words and pictures on a screen. And we’re out of context on Twitter, so we construct our identity: we write what we want people to know about us.’

There’s no doubt Twitter has reached a tipping point. The result is a change in the way we conduct our relationships, and a lot of extra fuel to the ‘too much information online’ debate. However, Alicia agrees with Brooks, that you can only ever reveal a few layers of yourself on Twitter. ‘I think Twitter is a more private way of putting yourself out there than Facebook – people can’t browse through your embarrassing photos!’ She smiles and adds, ‘Twitter is more like that line in Pretty Woman: “l say when, l say who, l say how much”.’

Follow us on Twitter @CosmopolitanSA.

Author: Rebecca Whish
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